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Joke of the Day

"I saved a bunch of money on car insurance By switching to reverse and fleeing the scene"

"I'm an old guy, and I fuck at least 3 super hot girls in their mid 20's every week I'm a student loan collector"

"Groot asks a man for help, the man says... ""Hodor""."

"Unfortunately..... Nobody wants to have sex with your inner beauty."

"The Rock just announced he's having a baby girl... I bet he names her Marble."

"It's the story of Zip the penguin. It's a penguin, walking happily on the ice, and.... Ziiiiiiip the penguin!"

"A couple of crows were in prison the other day... They were held for attempted murder."

"What do you do to a dead fruit? You *berry* it."

"Pig's explanation for the creation of the Universe: The Pig Bang Theory."

"Ignorance is not bliss. It's just a fancy word for stupid."