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Joke of the Day
"How do you know a car is from Poland? The Polish."
Next Joke
"Whenever I hear a Mexican talking excitedly, I always imagine him explaining food, soccer or that someone is stuck in a barbed wire fence."
"I self medicate, therefore you live."
"The final stage of adulthood is when you start saying, ""Oooh, that breeze feels nice."""
"If i were a pro wrestler my finisher would be struggling to put together an IKEA chair then smashing it on the other dude in frustration"
"The declawed cats that I feel most sorry for are the ones that want to play scratch off lottery tickets."
"If you need me I'll always be stuck behind the person who doesn't know how to use the CVS self-checkout aisle."
"There is a fine line between public and pubic"
"Am I supposed to bring condoms to a speed dating event? How fast do these things actually go?"
"What do you call a man from Portugal? A Portugoose. Because you cant have one gees."