111941

Joke of the Day

"Don't joke about 9/11. My father died that day. I clearly remember what the last words he said to me were. ''Allahu Akbar''"

"I've never been good with 'pick-up' lines I once said to this girl, ""Hey, you get fries with that shake?"" It turns out she had Parkinson's."

"they should stop calling it the ""Make-A-Wish Foundation"" and start calling it the ""No.... Make-Another-Wish Foundation"""

"Why don't Dunkin' Donuts employees wear name tags? It wouldn't fit on their shirt."

"Most people call me ""bad at pickup lines"" But you? You can call me tonight."

"Relationship status: outside my wife's window, holding John Cusack over my head."

"Ladies: To see how a guy is in bed, watch him put on a shoe. Does he just cram his foot in? Or does he lick the shoe fully then gently enter"

"I encourage my kids to explore art. I insist they know Picasso's Blue Period had nothing to do with the menstrual cycle of a Smurf."

"A man's wife gets angry about him switching to bitcoins He says ""Why don't you switch to bitchcoins?"""

"Why are Women like buses? You wait all day for one then find out 48 other people in the local area have been riding on her."