111357

Joke of the Day

"This is a baby horse: it can walk 4 hours after it's born This is a baby human: don't touch its head wrong or you'll bonk its brain"

"You know what I've noticed a lot of posts about recently? The Baader-Meinhof phenomenon."

"I was sitting there... A lady walked into the bar I asked her ""Did it hurt?"""

"I say ""parched"" so everyone knows I'm thirsty AND an asshole."

"What do you call a rabbi who plays baseball? Big League Jew."

"You know why you never see I next to Y? I don't know why."

"Hillary's mad at Satan Hillary: Satan! We had a deal! Where's the election victory that you promised me? Satan: Where's the soul that you said you had?"

"Me: Can u send me those documents? Coworker: Yes, but u can actually get them by-- Me: Nope, don't try teaching me to fish. Not interested."

"What do you get when you put your hand in a blender? A hand shake."

"Who do penguins celebrate Hanukkah with? The Icebergs"