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Joke of the Day

"How Do You Break Up With Your Girlfriend? www.AshleyMadison.com"

"What's BROWN and making California a miserable place to live? California Governor Jerry BROWN you racist asshole!"

"Where are the longest hairs of the body? Inside the nose. Because every time you pull one, you feel the pain until your ass."

"Q: What happens when two snails fight? A: They slug it out."

"Why is Riot Fest going to be in Toronto? They play music, not hockey."

"Mom: If a boy touches your boobs say ""don't"" and if he touches your pussy say ""stop""? Girl: But mom, he touched both so I said ""don't stop"". "

"*opens ""Job Interview Handbook"" *reads ""dress for the job you want"" *goes to computer *opens browser *Googles ""ladies' bicycle seat costume"""

"I really hate my partners calling me the wrong name during sex. My name is not ""Help"" or ""Get off me""."

"I had an awkward moment with my english teacher. Apparently pathetic fallacy has nothing to do with erectile dysfunction."

"What do you call it when the bull impales the bullfighter? A hole in Juan!"