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Joke of the Day
"What's the best benefit of working for ISIS? early retirement"
Next Joke
"A pick-up line for a lovely lady Hey babe, are you a fart? -cause you just blew me away."
"[at the gym] PERSONAL TRAINER: What kind of body do you want to have? ME: *leans in close* I'd prefer human"
"Feminist I don't understand why women want to be equal when they could be better. That shows a lack of ambition to me. Which is why men are better."
"What do you call somebody with no body and just a nose? Nobody knows!"
"Eating too much cake is the deadly sin of gluttony But not eating too much pie, because the sin of pi is always zero."
"Build a barricade?! Crap, I thought you said build a bear arcade. Those bears are gonna be pissed when I tell them no more Cruis'n USA."
"Beethoven was such a hipster... ... that he never even heard some of his own music."
"I stayed up all night... Trying to remember if I had amnesia or insomnia"
"I wish I were a Jedi. I don't want to use the Force or anything. I just want to hang out in my bathrobe all day."