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Joke of the Day

"A naughty child was irritating all the passengers on the flight from London to New York. At last one man could stand it no longer. ""Hey kid,"" he shouted. ""Why don't you go outside and play?"""

Next Joke
 
"What do you get if you drink too much Gin? A double Gin"
"*Walks into school* Simon says give me your Pokemon cards Ok now close your eyes *Walks out* Kids are so dumb I didn't even say Simon says"
"What did the captain of the alien mouse spaceship say when he met his first earth mouse? Take me to your Liederkranz."
"I eat sunflower seeds because I like food but I absolutely love littering"
"Lawn Sprinkler What do you call four Mexicans, one Chinaman, and three Blacks standing in a yard? Lawn sprinkler. ""Spick spick spick spick, chink, nigga nigga nigga."""
"What do you call an empty cheese whiz jar? Cheese Was! some old guy came up to me on the street and told me this one."
"hey maybe ur parents care so much about ur birthday becuase it celebrates how long theyve been able to keep something alive for"
"[in bed] ""No, I'm serious Amy. If this were a buddy cop movie would you try to avenge my murder even after the Chief took your gun & badge?"""
"Funny prank: Put a cinder block in someone's pillowcase and right when they say ""What the fuck?!"" let like six wolves into their room."