110022

Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a taliban outpost and an Afghani Elementary school? I don't know, I just fly the drones"

"Me: Ugh. Something I ate this morning didn't agree with me. [Inside my stomach] Chicken Quesadilla: ""The Notebook"" was an overrated film."

"What do amputees and cricket have in common? Stumps"

"I basically have three hairstyles. 1. Straight 2. Wavy 3. Homeless"

"According to my gym trainer, I need to cut back on drinking According to my bartender, I look great Moral of the story: I'm drunk"

"I'm a shy person with low self-esteem, but I'll tell you a great joke ..if you promise not to laugh."

"Avocado or Donald Trump? Avocado or Donald Trump for president? Well, one is a wrinkly old bag filled with green mush The other one is an avocado."

"I don't know why so many people blame their air conditioning for their inability to spell."

"Please don't tag me in photos where I'm not wearing my roller skates, I'm looking for a boyfriend."

"No human will ever understand humiliation like a dog who happens to run into a wolf while wearing a sweater."