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Joke of the Day

"Before my father kicked the bucket he asked me the most profound question... He said ""How far do you think I can kick this bucket?"""

"How far can you walk into the forest? Halfway, when you walk further then you will walk out of the forest! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH"

"Why do men need instant replay on TV sports? Because after 30 seconds they forget what happened."

"How do you explain this gap in your resume? ""I was in jail."" Okay. Sure you weren't working for Trump's campaign? ""Swear to God. Jail."""

"How did the nervous female organ that was going to Hollywood feel? They were overreacting."

"why do gorillas have such big nostrils? because they have big fingers"

"What has two wings and a halo? A Chinese phone call."

"What would be a great name for a Mexican Boy Band? Juan Direction."

"TIL Thesaurus is not a dinosaur"

"""Maybe she's born with it. Maybe she's a monster wearing a shit ton of makeup."" -Maybelline"