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Joke of the Day

"Dear girls who take a picture in slutty clothing and glasses & label the caption ""Geek lol"" You're not a geek, you're a whore who found glasses"

"Did you hear about the circus fire? It was in tents."

"The inventor of large scholarly books showed me his factory. He said, ""Make yourself a tome."""

"I gave my girlfriend a birthday celebration that lasted only half a minute After all, it was her thirty second birthday."

"What do you call a Jewish Pokemon trainer. Ash."

"George W. Bush isn't writing a memoir, but ""an account of key decisions"", such as 9/11, Iraq, and ""all the other things Cheney made me do."""

"What's the best month for dating? Sep-tinder!"

"What do you get when you cross a dyslexic, an atheist, an insomniac? A person that lays awake late at night and ponders if there's such a thing as a dog."

"You can tell Tim Horton's is a Canadian franchise, because my donut just apologized for making me fat."

"You can't run in a campground, you can only ran because it's past tense."