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Joke of the Day

"When my Great Grandmother was a kid she asked her dad for a ring with a cat on it. Her father replied with stick your finger up the cats ass."

"Banning us to the couch is not as bad as you believe it is ladies. It makes us feel manly. Like we're camping. With an angry bear close by."

"A refrigerator is the exact opposite of a drug addict. It starts off in a box and then moves to a house."

"My ""friend"" Adam gave me an electric toothbrush for my birthday. Completely unnecessary. My gas-powered toothbrush still runs fine, ""Adam."""

"What are a redneck's last two words before dying ? WATCH THIS !"

"A Limerick There once was a man from the Styx Who liked to write Limericks But he failed at the sport Because he wrote them too short"

"I've known my drug dealer since I was this high."

"What happens when you sit on a grape? It gives out a little wine!"

"D.E.L.T.A. Airlines Didn't Even Leave The Airport"

"My resolution? To eat like a normal person, as opposed to my old habit of hate-fucking my mouth with a fork."