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Joke of the Day

"Fun prank: ONLY explain gay marriage to your kids and then watch other people try to explain their weird straight marriages."

"Whats that when you keep moving constantly produces something white ? Its toothbrush dear dirty minded people.."

"[first day as a doctor] You seem depressed. Also you look underweight, how's your diet? [nurse interrupts me] ""Dr that's the model skeleton"""

"What happens to a frog that parks illegally? He gets toad."

"How do the Russian people feel about their government? They're Putin up with it."

"Why does China have such a large population??? Because their condoms were Made in China."

"What do you call a dog with iron balls? Sparky."

"Do you why I never excel during a meeting? Because I use powerpoint for my presentation, of course."

"What do you call an exaggeration of mens genitalia? A phallus-y!"

"[talking to zoo attendant as I slowly take out a $50 bill] ""No"" What? ""You can't sit in the Kangaroos pouch"" *places $50 back in my pocket*"