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Joke of the Day

"Reading popular baby names. Once again, Adolf is nowhere to be found."

"It takes many nails to build a crib... ...but only one screw to fill it."

"Leave Apple alone! All they wanted to do was jack off."

"What do you call a fish that can't sing? An out-of-tuna!"

"Girlfriend and I placed a bet to see who was better at Super Smash Bros for the N64 I beat her so badly! I do wish we had a chance to actually play a race before I had to take her to the hospital..."

"French girls are great... For example, my French girlfriend taught me how to eat out in the bush."

"Gin is the Ionian mode of liquors... it will always resolve with tonic."

"*gets caught kissing an optical illusion* it's not what it looks like!"

"It's International Holocaust Remembrance Day And Fugghedaboutit Day in Germany."

"Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? ... They're really good at it."