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Joke of the Day
"What's smokey the bear's middle name? The."
Next Joke
"I'm gonna open a business to wax chests with no pain at all. ...But can I really pull it off?"
"[getting fired from NASA] Is it because I kept saying ""Technically we're already in space?"""
"Blind man walks into a bar... And a table, and a chair."
"ME: i'm nervous WIFE: don't be. just be confident [later] BOSS: so do you think you'd be right for the job ME: *confidently* no"
"I USED VOLUMIZING SHAMPOO TODAY AND NOW I CAN'T STOP SHOUTING!"
"New lesbian species of dinosaur discovered. Lickalottapus."
"""Press the cube root of the 11th digit of pi divided by .5 and doubled if you'd like to speak with a customer service representative."""
"What did one ball say to the other? Who's the dick in the middle?"
"Why don't lawyers play hide-and-seek? Nobody will look for them."