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Joke of the Day

"What are the effects of biggest brainwashing book in human history? i dont know...try asking the suicide bombers"

"What did the pay phone say when the quarter got stuck inside it? Money's tight these days!"

"What is black and white and red all over, and spins in circles? A nun who has a spear in her, going through a vevolving door."

"My Doctor Told Me I'd Have To Stop Masturbating . . . I'm like, ""What? I thought it was OK!"" He goes, ""Yeah, sure, but I'm trying to examine you!"""

"JESUS: today im going to walk on water JUDAS: NO DONT-- [jesus walks onto ocean. entire ocean turns to wine. all ocean life dies instamtly]"

"What is the derivative of 151? Poke(dx)"

"A joke my sister told me. Q: how does a black woman prevent crime? A: she has an abortion"

"Sarcasm is truly the most significant force in the world. Seriously, where would we be without sarcasm?"

"I recently did a survey on Syria. The results blew me away."

"I've been running as fast as I can, but I still can't catch my breath."