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Joke of the Day
"Knock knock... Who's there? I did up. I did up-who?"
Next Joke
"A tattered rope walks into a bar... The bartender says, ""Hey, are you a lasso?"" The rope replies, ""Sorry, I'm a frayed knot."""
"""I can't wait until this one orange erases years of poor eating choices."" -me, dieting"
"I notice you only call when you want something Person calling: ma'am your bill is 90 days past due"
"There are two types of people in the world... Those who pee in the shower and dirty feckin liars!"
"I've been ""watching my weight"" and, rest assured, it's still there."
"What does it's job ONLY after it has been fired? A bullet"
"Baby metamorphosis I feel like nobody names their baby Craig. One day, around age 35, the baby just becomes Craig. that is all"
"My neighbor's 13-month old only has four teeth. She's way too young to being doing that much meth."
"Whoever said the camera adds 10 pounds should stop eating cameras."