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Joke of the Day

"Men at 25 play football. Men at 40 play tennis. Men at 60 play golf. Have you noticed that as you get older your balls get smaller?"

"What do you call a free gigolo? Pro-boner."

"How do you know if a hippo is in your oven? The door won't close"

"If you skip church on Sundays.. You're pulling a Christian Bale."

"Went for a handshake and got snubbed. So I turned it into an impromptu Macarena dance, since I didn't wanna look stupid"

"I speak 4 languages: English, Profanity, Sarcasm, and Real shit."

"There's plenty of jobs in the porn industry when you have a dick like mine. Camera man, light and sound technician."

"I started a band called 999 Megabytes ... we haven't gotten a gig yet"

"Why do Scuba divers fall backwards into the water? Because if they fell forwards, they'd still be in the boat"

"So I'm taking a Terrorism and Covert Politics class Pretty sure I bombed the midterm."