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Joke of the Day

"Went for a handshake and got snubbed. So I turned it into an impromptu Macarena dance, since I didn't wanna look stupid"

"Hey Girl is your Dad an Astronaut??Because I'm from Nasa. There has been a terrible accident at the Space Station and he is dead"

"Knock Knock ..."

"When a guy wearing cargo pants hits on me I'm tempted to go out with him just to see how many of my belongings I can fit into his pockets."

"i always get gatorade and gasoline confused. my car is real good at sports and im dead"

"I put on one of those things that prevents me from ever having children. A shell suit."

"My dick is like my ring finger... Average in length and width and probably won't see much use until marriage."

"What do you call a person with no body and no nose? Nobody knows."

"When I was 6 I got coal from Santa... The next year I decided to get back at him and poison the cookies. Somehow, the bastard found out and killed my dad"

"What's Blue, Orange and Lying at the Bottom of a Swimming Pool? What's blue, orange and lying at the bottom of a swimming pool? A baby with popped floaties."