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Joke of the Day

"There's plenty of jobs in the porn industry when you have a dick like mine. Camera man, light and sound technician."

"Back when I was a kid there was no internet so people would sometimes have to walk for miles just to call me a cunt."

"I wonder why nobody told Forrest Gump's mom that all you have to do is flip over the box of chocolates and it tells you what's inside."

"What's the difference between Audi drivers and a cactus? Audi drivers have pricks on the inside"

"Scared the postman by going to the door naked. I'm not sure what scared him more, my naked body or the fact that I knew where he lived."

"why did god make girls so stupid? so that they would love boys"

"16 Sodium atoms walked into a bar followed by Batman"

"How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them."

"What's your best one-liner?"

"After watching TV with my kids, I think I have figured out what's wrong with this generation....their cartoons suck."