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Joke of the Day

"I used to be into necrophilia, S&M, and Bestiality... Then i realized i was beating a dead horse. *i'll let myself out*"

"What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? The bench can support a family of 4."

"What do you call a woman who throws letters in the fire? Bernadette"

"At which place do mostly all men and women have curly hair? Namibia... but i like the way you think ( )"

"People always say to do exercise, I do Breathing... Could I be more WORKING!"

"Every time my Father in law gets trashed, he asks if I've lost weight... So naturally I bring a bottle of scotch every time we visit."

"How do you clean a condom? Turn it inside-out and shake the fuck out of it."

"""To label you ""divine"" would be to capture but a fraction of your resplendence. ... and could you pleeeeease grab an Oreo while you're up?"""

"I DIDN'T SAFELY EJECT MY FLASH DRIVE AND NOW MY DOG IS DEAD"

"Why did the cow win a Nobel Prize? Because he was out standing in his field."