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Joke of the Day

"How did i escape Iraq? Iran."

"What did the constipated maths teacher do when he got stuck? got a pencil and worked it out."

"Which news outlet has the most interesting Black Lives Matter coverage? BBC"

"PETER PIPER: honey i picked another peck of pickled peppers WIFE: [motioning to pantry already full of peppers] peter literally what the fu"

"Who has one thumb and isn't allowed to use the table saw anymore? This guy."

"Do you know why they can't make ice in Poland anymore? The lady that had the recipe died."

"Being killed by a paper-cut would be... Quite a novel way to die."

"[First date] Ok, don't let her know you're a pharmacist Her: Can you pass the salt? ""Sure, it'll be ready in two hours."""

"Soon we'll all have to sign an apartment lease, sign up for electricity, and water, and cable, and school didn't teach any of this."

"What is a black guy's favorite game to play with the kids? Peekaboo."