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Joke of the Day
"Why weren't the baked beans heating up? They were just chilling"
Next Joke
"You cannot play with me unless you blow me. -Balloon"
"If I could have a finger on my penis. I could pick'n'flick, with my dick."
"Me: I am sad, we don't have any cookie crumble for my ice cream. Wife: lots of things make me sad, like being married to a giant man baby"
"I was always told by my father to fight fire with fire... ...And that's how he got kicked out of the fire brigade."
"ladies and gentlemen this is your captain speaking... and this [copilot starts sick beatbox] is your captain rapping ALL OUT OF FUEL ALL OUT"
"[Last supper] Jesus: Same time next week guys? *they all nod* Judas: I'll book a table for 12 Jesus: you mean 13 Judas: yeah..13, I meant 13"
"A man has a heart attack on a plane. The man who was sitting next to him stood up and shouted""Is anyone here a doctor"" The woman in front of them then stood up and shouted ""I'm a vegan!""."
"nuance is cancelled. ur either good or bad. if ur good but then u say something bad, then ur bad now n therefore cancelled"
"Going to How to Train Your Dragon tomorrow... Or marriage guidance counselling as the wife calls it."