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Joke of the Day
"Pirate: The cannons be ready, captain. Captain: Are."
Next Joke
"Why did Bill Clinton say NO to testosterone meds? He was afraid of ending up like Hillary."
"What's the difference between the ISIS headquarters and a kindergarten? I don't know, I just fly the drone."
"Either way, I don't think we should let Shrodinger near any more cats."
"Pretty sure this dollar store toothpaste is just white paint."
"What do you call a gay guy paralyzed from the neck down? A Tomato (because he's both a fruit AND a vegetable)"
"Going to McDonald's for a salad is like going to a whorehouse for a hug."
"What helps humans get laid but is deadly for fish? Pick up lines"
"I always take a condom with me on a night out. Unfortunately, it is always the same one..."
"Happy Independence Day! oh wait..."