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Joke of the Day
"What I want for Xmas... I asked Santa for a sister. He asked for my mom."
Next Joke
"Condoms prevent minivans."
"You wake in a field, nude, grass stained elbows, knees and a condom in your ass, Do you tell anyone? No? Wanna come camping with me this weekend?"
"How do you confuse a gay person? Seven."
"7yo: MOMMA DO YOU THINK YOU'LL EVER GET A 6-PACK OR ARE YOU JUST GONNA BE FAT Me: *slowly shreds Pokemon cards w/out breaking eye contact*"
"I own a lot of cleaning supplies for someone whose friends inscribed ""dust me"" on my coffee table recently."
"What would Michael Jackson be doing if he were alive right now? Probably clawing at the inside of his coffin."
"What do they serve at birthday parties in heaven? Angel food cake of course!"
"Ebola lingers in semen for nine months... I couldn't think of a decent punchline, but there's a winner out there for this headline for sure. . Highest voted comment wins the punchline."
"If you suddenly realize it's 3pm and you've gotten nothing accomplished, it's OK to go back to bed."