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Joke of the Day

"The estate of Charles Dickens is too make alcoholic beverages from the apples on their land The slogan is ""All the girls love a Dickens Cider"""

"This sushi restaurant has the worst service ever. ""Sir, this is an aquarium."""

"LPT: Laminate your index cards when studying. Not only does it prevent smearing, but the teardrops actually roll right off."

"Admit it.... Sometimes you just wish you could read your crushes mind to find out how they feel about you?"

"A black man takes a girl home from a nightclub... She says, ""Show me it's true what they say about black men."" ;) So he stabs her & steals her purse."

"Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and they stink"

"9/11 Who? Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11 9/11 Who? I thought you said you would never forget!"

"What are a philosopher's favorite type of chips? Plato Nachos"

"I got banned from /r/ELI5 the other day I don't understand why"

"What are some towing related jokes i can impress my car club coworkers with? I've already got that the frog called our car club to get toad, but that's about where my puns end."