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Joke of the Day

"*stares into wormhole* Whoa man, cool. *gets slapped by worm* Pervert! *worm wiggles away*"

"In the game of poker, you have to play the hand you're dealt. Unless it's a literal hand. Then it's a redeal."

"U ever squeeze out a turd so big that it feels like u traveled through time once it's out? anyway forgive me father for i have sinned"

"This guy just scrolls through his Facebook page... And then he notices that ""Steve (Minecraft) has blocked you."""

"Why did the cross eyed teacher quit her job? Because she couldn't control her pupils."

"My favorite way to ruin a romantic evening is by coming out of the bathroom naked and singing Love Boat until the waiter asks us to leave."

"How is learning to ride a bicycle and 9/11 alike? Because you never forget!"

"Today, I saw that my ironing board cover was wrinkled. I laughed at the irony. Then I laughed again because irony has the word iron in it."

"Why is crack a ""Rock""? Because it's as hard to get off as Alcatraz."

"The HARDEST part about being a teenager? Probably having to sigh a second time when the first was too quiet."