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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the newlywed couple that didn't know the difference between KY Jelly and silicone caulk? The glass fell out of their windows."

"Did you hear the joke about the roof? I would tell you, but it tends to go over people's heads"

"Opinions are like assholes... sometimes you need a second asshole"

"What is love? Baby don't hurt me."

"My girlfriend is like John Cena I can't see her :("

"Saw a bumper sticker with a gun and ""I don't call 911!"" Jesus. I hope his wife doesn't fall down the stairs. ""Sorry darlin'."" -*BLAM BLAM*"

"What's the best thing about fucking a pregnant woman? Getting a blowjob at the same time."

"Man Bun? or Douche Knot? neither, it's a fairy tail."

"Subway to release a statement next week In light of recent events, kids now get free 6 inches."

"Drank 3 shots of espresso and can now feel every part of my skin at once AMA"