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Joke of the Day
"[creation of bats] God: stretch out that mouse"
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"If the USSR were to become a country again... ...would it be called the Soviet Reunion?"
"If you could go back in time and kill any person for the good of the future, who would you kill? Trump"
"My girlfriend has really changed since she became a vegetarian... ...sometimes I feel like I've never seen herbefore."
"I have beef- -aroni."
"I have a horse named mayo... Mayo neighs."
"What do 9 out of 10 people call a good time? Gang rape."
"'They'll be searching for days!' I giggle as I leave 'sorry bout the damage notes' on random cars at the Costco"
"Ten things only 90s people remember: 1. 1990 2. 1991 3. 1992 4. 1993 5. 1994 6. 1995 7. 1996 8. 1997 9. 1998 10. That sound the modems made"
"Properly relocating a cavewoman Q: Why did the caveman drag his cavewoman around by the hair? A: Because if he dragged her around by the feet she would fill up with dirt."