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Joke of the Day

"An atheist, a vegan, and a crossfitter walk into a bar... I only know because they told everyone within two minutes."

"Moby jumped over a mountain.... of air. . . . . . . What did you expect?"

"If you love someone, set them free. If they come back with two police officers, you'll know that setting them free was a bad idea."

"There's this one girl student in my class that always dresses slutty and shows of her curves... ...and that's not even the best part about home-schooling"

"How much does a hipster weigh? ....An instagram."

"You guys hear about the new Lebron James phone? It only vibrates, it doesn't have a ring."

"Did you know Princess Di had dandruff? Yeah, they found her head and shoulders in the dashboard."

"The first rule of Thesaurus Club is you don't talk about, mention, speak of, discuss, or chat about Thesaurus Club."

"Women's Rights."

"Is there a way to make a hamburger do the Hula? Sure order a burger and a shake!"