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Joke of the Day

"What kind of tie does a ghost wear to a formal party? A boo-tie."

"Sorry for the absence, my tweeties. My hubs and kids cooked their own dinner, and I've been unfreezing hell with a blowtorch ever since."

"I want to be the guy in a rap song that justs says YEA"

"What's the difference between a wife and a girlfriend? About 45 pounds."

"Did you know that Native Americans were really good strippers? Every time they danced, they made it rain."

"An old man went to the doctor The doctor says ""I'm afraid I have bad news. You have cancer... And you have alzheimer's."" The old man says ""Well, at least I don't have cancer!"""

"I try to say at least one bad thing about somebody after they die just to counter all the compliments they're getting."

"Last night I found out you can make a lot of people REALLY angry if you dress in a Star Trek costume and also carry a light saber"

"Have I told you lately... ...is the least romantic line a toll-collector ever said to his girlfriend."

"Why was the pig happy when reviewers criticized his story? Because they called it garbage."