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Joke of the Day
"Sometimes an unfollow can be so therapeutic."
Next Joke
"WIFE: I want u to be more spontaneous ME: ok [later] ME: *hides in closet with goalie mask on waiting for her to walk by*"
"You had me at, ""we'll make it look like an accident."""
"What do you call a sink that doesn't work? A faux-cet."
"PILOT OVER INTERCOM: I have some bad news, but before I tell you, keep in mind that the Wright bros could only stay airborne for 12 seconds"
"I found a rating for the Sun online. It was only a star."
"Why do Ethiopian women give the best blowjobs? You know they'll swallow"
"Hey scientists, you gave us Viagra, Cialis, and Levitra. How about you stop playing with your dicks and give us something for cancer?"
"Today i learned that the average person has 8 sexual partners in their lifetime Today i also learned im a whore"
"If the world's fate ever hangs on my mom opening a picture mail on her phone in under ten minutes, we are all doomed."