103230

Joke of the Day

"[purposefully keeps messing up my hot dog eating scene] director: cut! [sighs] bring in another hot dog, take 11"

"My girlfriend said if I don't stop my obsession with Viking culture she'll fight me to the death ""Jokes on you"" I said ""if I die in battle I'll go straight to Valhalla"""

"*finds own number on a bathroom stall* Call for a good time!? This is outrageous! *crosses out good; writes in GREAT* There. Fixed."

"My cute kitten Aww, wrong sub."

"How does a West Virginia husband tell if his wife is on the rag? (NSFW) He sucks his son's dick to see if it tastes like shit."

"Procrastination is just like Masturbation It's fun while you're doing it until you realize all you did was fuck yourself."

"Katherine lost both her arms in an accident. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Katherine."

"Your place or mine? Tell you what? I'll flip a coin. Head at my place, tail at yours."

"Two gerbils....(NSFW) ...are walking down the street and come up to a gay bar. One turns to his friend and asks. >Wanna go inside and get shit faced? Lemmiwinks is your clue."

"Pedophile almost wins marathon... He just came in a little behind."