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Joke of the Day

"Why don't the French have fireworks on Bastille day? because they would all surrender."

"Where do astronauts leave their spaceships ? At parking meteors !"

"Three men walk into a bar The fourth one asks ""You guys ok? Didn't you see that low hanging bar?"""

"Why couldn't Hillary win the election? Women only win .7 votes for every one a man wins."

"I went for a run and got back two minutes later because I forgot something, I forgot I'm fat and can't run for more than two minutes."

"Married sex is a lot like Prison sex... The sex you're wanting, you're not getting. And the sex you're getting, you're not wanting."

"What do you call it when you lobotomize a bunch of terrorists? Simplifiying Radicals. (MATH joke)"

"Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens? All they said was, Bach, Bach, Bach"""

"Banana starts with a B but normally starts with a N."

"Whats the difference between Tiger Woods and Princess Diana? Tiger Woods had a better driver."