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Joke of the Day

"If we could harness the fake enthusiasm put towards wishing people a happy birthday on Facebook, we could power half the planet."

"What do frogs say that surf the internet? Reddit reddit.. First joke i thought of. :)"

"No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery."

"How do black people die from a drive by? Everytime someone screams ""get down! "" they stand up and start dancing!"

"What do you call a sick bird who has crossed a national border without consent? An ILL-EAGLE! 2X COMBO"

"I thought you were Russian... ...but it turns out you were just Stalin and Putin me off."

"A man walks up to the counter at the airport. ""Can I help you?"" asks the agent. ""I want a round trip ticket"" says the man. ""Where to?"" asks the agent. ""Right back to here."""

"If a woman falls in the kitchen and I pretend not to hear it, does she still hear the sound of me tweeting about it?"

"What do you call a Skyrim fan that is good at CSGO? Nova'kiin"

"I actually don't really hate anybody at all except for Oprah,David spade, Kevin James, the mom from the Berenstain Bears, Sheryl Crow, Kevin"