1030

Joke of the Day

"I'm worried about my friend My friend has just be diagnosed as a Polaroid Schizophrenic. It developed quickly."

"All I want for Christmas is my own perfume commercial where I say random words like 'hope' and 'passion' & look like a date rape victim."

"I contacted Screwfix the other day. Once again they have assured me they're not a dating agency."

"I wear a stethoscope, so that in the case of a medical emergency, I can teach people a valuable lesson about assumptions."

"Hey yogurt, settle down with the commercials. You're YOGURT!"

"Procrastinators be like; Sofa so good My attempt on pun"

"Two men walk into a BAR... The third one ducked!"

"I hate seeing babies are kissing eachother. It's like, get a womb."

"No one laughed at my geography joke I guess you had to be there."

"I dropped my toothpaste! ...Tom exclaimed, crestfallen."