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Joke of the Day

"I wear a stethoscope, so that in the case of a medical emergency, I can teach people a valuable lesson about assumptions."

"If a Tesla car gets stolen . . . would it be called an Edison?"

"My life is a constant struggle between wanting people to text me and never wanting to reply to texts."

"Why should you never let a non-metal drive a train? Because they're poor conductors! (I know they're called Engineers but cut me some slack, I thought of this in the 9th grade.)"

"Theres this one word I always stumble on when I try to remember it.... oh yeah, the word is forget."

"What happens to a drunk vampire? They get a fangover."

"I'm like a Rubik's Cube, the more you play with me the harder I get!"

"Did you know Kurt Cobain had dandruff? They found his Head & Shoulders behind the couch."

"Why did the elf have to play with Mega Bloks? Because he was Legoless"

"[Request] Girls names and bike parts puns I can only think of IsaBELL anyone have any good ones? (Sorry if requests aren't allowed in this subreddit just delete if necessary!)"