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Joke of the Day

"Asked my co-worker if saw the big news report... He said which one, The Mac 'n Cheetos announcement or the UK doing something? True story, from 3 min ago... 'Murica"

"The Outsiders: Why is Ponyboy lactose intolerant? He hates Dairy but likes Sodapop."

"Anyone who feels bad about dumping a huge national debt on the next generation hasn't spent a lot of time around teenagers."

"You don't love Dunkin' Donuts coffee, you love heavy cream."

"My tampon just leaked during my bath and now it looks like I made a tub full of passion fruit tea."

"""Size DOES matter"", I whisper to my double stuffed Oreos."

"A man goes to see a psychologist wear only plastic wrap on his whole body The psychologist says well I can see your nuts"

"Why did Blackbeard cross the road? To indicate where the treasure is buried."

"I drink my alcohol responsibly...spilling is not an option"

"Fantasy Football Why won't fantasy football let me pick up Aaron Hernandez? He'd be killing on my team!"