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Joke of the Day

"Asked my co-worker if saw the big news report... He said which one, The Mac 'n Cheetos announcement or the UK doing something? True story, from 3 min ago... 'Murica"

"What did the janitor say when he came out of the closet? SUPPLIES!"

"Do black people get sunburns? I don't know... Most prisons are indoors."

"HELLO I SEE THAT YOU SLIGHTLY TOUCHED YOUR MOUSE WOULD YOU LIKE TO UPDATE JAVA?"

"What do a plumber and a walrus both enjoy? A nice tight seal"

"Are there any other animals besides humans who communicate unnecessarily?"

"What are the three kinds of women's cancer? 1. Breast Cancer 2. Ovarian Cancer 3. Feminism"

"""And you don't want hairy hands, now do you? Oh! And googling 'it' will make you go blind..okay! Mommy loves you."" - Sis at her 9 year old."

"I always like to keep $7000.00 on me in case I wanna stop at Whole Foods and get some fruit"

"I didn't want to believe my flatmate was stealing from his job as highway maintenance ...but when I got home all the signs were there."