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Joke of the Day

"""And you don't want hairy hands, now do you? Oh! And googling 'it' will make you go blind..okay! Mommy loves you."" - Sis at her 9 year old."

"Opinions are like butts *gently rubs your opinion*"

"Why did Tupac go to the gym? To get a sixpac! (Thank you 7th grade me)"

"What would you have if all autos in the US were painted pink? A Pink Car Nation!"

"Every letter likes Jews... but not-Z"

"Never trust a depressed elevator. It'll only bring you down."

"{discussing wedding dresses} CW1: I had mine preserved. CW2: I donated mine to a charity. You? Me: I used mine as kindling for a bonfire."

"Taking BuzzFeed's millennialness quiz. Apparently having mental health issues and not knowing your gender is 100% millennial."

"People keep saying that Americans are stupid, but I disagree. Anyone that builds a city 30 feet below sea level, in a hurricane zone, and fills it with blacks is a fking genius!"

"Yo mamma so dumb... ...her offspring think 'Yo mamma' jokes are funny!"