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Joke of the Day

"Q: Why did the traffic light turn red? A: Because it saw the other one changing!"

"What do Native American pubescent hipsters who would like to join a group often say? Clandestine."

"What do you call a floating Jew? Ashes in the wind."

"got removed from r/showerthoughts but... Helen Keller really only knew a hand-full of words..."

"My girlfriend said I was a pedophile.... I told her ""that's an awful big word for a 9 year old""."

"cop: the perp was found with red paint on his fingers, so i guess you could say he was caught.. *looks at camera* why is there a camera here"

"Why did Steve hate being the youngest clone? Because all his genes were hand me downs."

"Christmas gift What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer."

"What do you call someone who went into a birth clinic and started shooting at everyone there? Spawn camper."

"That scene from Jurassic Park where the T-Rex is breathing heavily up against the jeep glass, except its me at the hotdog display in 7/11"