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Joke of the Day

"How do you make a gay fuck a woman? Shit in her cunt."

"But HOW will u make America great again? Trump: I'll make it like camp. A camp where u concentrate on how great I am. I'll call it a conce-"

"9 called to ask how much bleach it takes to get purple ink out of carpet and because she's so cute and at her dad's I went with all of it!"

"Why did the footballer hold his boot to his ear ? Because he liked sole music !"

"""I drive like lightening."" ""You drive fast?"" ""No. I hit trees."""

"COP: do you know why I pulled you over ME: knock knock COP: who's there ME: do you know why I pulled you over COP: *begins to sweat* n..no"

"Customer: Why don't you have doggie bags? Waiter: That would be cruelty to animals."

"What is Bear Grylls' favourite vegetable? Leek."

"Why did the witch get a car with manual transmission? Because she prefers to drive stick!"

"CNN has confirmed that aliens might actually be involved in the disappearance of Flight 370. At least two illegal immigrants were caught on camera boarding the plane."