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Joke of the Day

"I wonder who is being John Malkovich right now."

"Why did the terrorist buy himself a Porsche? He was going through a midlife ISIS :("

"What happened to the pessimistic abortion doctor? He developed a de-fetus attitude."

"Let's spend the rest of our next 5 to 7 years together."

"North Korea reminds me of a redhead Because they both have no Seoul"

"Why can't Jesus play Football? He has flashbacks every time he looks at the goal"

"I use to know a classic rim shot joke, but...umm tiss"

"You know what they say? Once you go white, you'll rob the world of it's resources and murder indigenous peoples."

"What makes women who own dogs such hot girlfriend material is that you KNOW that foxy mama is used to picking up turds"

"Did you hear about the man who had sex with a parrot? He got chirpes, and the bad news is...it's untweetable."