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Joke of the Day

"A new study says that lesbians have more orgasms than straight people. Of course they do. Have you ever heard of a dildo premature ejaculating?"

"What did the little boy with no hands get for Christmas? Cancer."

"How do you make a nun pregnant? (fixed) NSFW Dress her up as an altar boy and hope he misses."

"I tried this new oral contraceptive I asked a girl to have sex with me and she said no"

"Im never going to public bathrooms again Because last time i was there, shit went down"

"What's the difference between Comcast and hell ... Hell has better customer service."

"I asked the grocery store man if they had eggnog and he's like ""We only carry it at Christmastime"" so I was all ""Whatever, Hitler."""

"Whats the difference between a Blonde and a Washing Machine? The Washing Machine will not follow you around for 2 weeks after you dump a load in it!"

"Are you from Iraq? Cause i wanna see you Baghdad ass up."

"One lady to another, Do you talk to your husband during sex ? Yes, if he calls on my cell."