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Joke of the Day

"What's President Obama's favorite vegetable? Barack-oli"

"Being baptized is like having antivirus for a PC It helps protect you from consequences of sinning going forward (but not guaranteed)"

"When wearing a logo or clever t-shirt, make sure your rack looks good. No one likes reading stuff on a lumpy, wavy surface. You too, ladies."

"""weed is a gateway drug"" ""to what? the fridge? Hahaha"" *loses car, house, wife, and job because of fridge addiction*"

"The hardest part about being black is never knowing if any of your family members are secretly being played by Tyler Perry."

"I put suicide notes next to roadkill so their animal families have some closure."

"Why did the Polar bear struggle in geometry class? Because the teacher was a Cartesian bear."

"I figured out that if I have my kids hold on to my cell phone, I will never forget them anywhere again."

"What do you say when you are trying to comfort a grammar nazi? There, their, they're"

"What's the expiry date on plastic? [81](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/UYwYdFdoecA/0.jpg)"