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Joke of the Day
"Knock knock Who's there? Dave. Oh hi Dave, what's new? *The Boss Faints*"
Next Joke
"It's 2016, I don't need to set my clocks back manually I just have my Negro James do it for me."
"Why did the junkie walk into the pet store? To buy some quack croakaine!"
"Some people are grateful for the impact you made in their life.... It's not me, I think you're a prick."
"What do you call a kid with one arm and three legs? Unfortunate."
"How do you fix a woman's watch? - It doesn't matter. There is a clock on the oven."
"If I ever get promoted to God I'm creating cupcake trees."
"Why did they name themselves AC/DC? Because that's the chord progression in all their songs."
"""Grandpa, why did everyone make a big deal out of selfies when they're just pictures, oh and thanks a lot for doing nothing about climate."""
"It hit me as I was taking my kids trick or treating tonight...... I'm lucky it was just a golfcart"