101238

Joke of the Day

"Obama proved a black man can even be president.. And that no matter how high up a black man gets he can't get out of government housing!"

"I laid here for almost 10 minutes before anyone asked if I was okay after I pretended to get elecrocuted by the copier. Fuck these assholes."

"Hate when the cop is like, ""Sir, have you been petting kittens?"" and I say, ""I petted a few..."" as I open the car door and kittens spill out"

"Whats the difference between an elephant and a grape? They are both purple, except for the elephant."

"Let's bring back the word HOOTENANNY"

"*whispers to an avocado* ""I'm the good kind of fat, too."""

"I ran a whole 5K and didn't even eradicate cancer"

"The Christians are really taking the Dugger family scandal hard I drove by a Chick-fil-A and the flags were at half-staff..."

"Q: Why did the boy close his eyes before opening the refrigerator? A: He didn't want to see the salad dressing."

"I never run with scissors Those last two words were unnecessary"