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Joke of the Day

"Tits man or arse man? ""Tits man or arse man?"" I was asked. I really should have got in there earlier when they were giving out super hero names."

"What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? Choked"

"Words can't even describe how beautiful you are. But numbers can, 3/10."

"Watching the end credits of a movie so you can take note of the producer & director and never ever watch anything else that they make "

"It's not a ""junk drawer,"" it's a free-spirited drawer without expectations or limits."

"Yo momma is so fat... When she got on the scale it said, ""I need your weight not your phone number."""

"A guy shows up late for work Off to work A guy shows up late for work. The boss yells, You should've been here at 8.30!' He replies. Why? What happened at 8.30?'"

"*tips fedora at mosquito* M'laria"

"Chinese girls just aren't that into me. I wish I had more of a Tai Pei personality."

"What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? I don't know. He still hasn't opened his gifts."