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Joke of the Day

"What did the vampire say to the werewolf after discovering its blood is inedible? ""Fangs for nothing!"""

"Archaeologists found Beethoven furiously erasing his music When asked what he was doing Beethoven responded ""I'm decomposing"""

"Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor."

"Fred: Do you think I'm a fool? Harry: No. But what's my opinion against thousands of others?"

"What do you call a Bacon Lettuce Tomato sandwich at a gay pride parade? An LGBLT"

"Darth Vader could never find love.... He was looking in Alderaan places."

"The first thing I do when someone introduces themselves to me is forget what their name is."

"God: I call it a Caterpillar Angel: What is it? God: A worm with feet Angel: You're really out of ideas huh? God: Then it grows wings"

"I saved a girl from getting Raped today ........... i changed my mind."

"How do magicians retire? They seem to just disappear."