101094

Joke of the Day

"I asked a pretty, young, homeless woman if I could take her home, and she said yes' with a big smile. The look on her face quickly changed when I walked off with her cardboard box."

"I saw a woman crying as she was buying tampons earlier. Must be going through a tough period in her life."

"I think Android application developers are magical. They're like open sorcerers."

"What's the difference between Rutgers and Rikers? One turns young people into horrible human beings and the other is jail."

"Once you go Norris, you are physically unable to go back."

"I did two tours in Afghanistan and one in Iraq Thank you for the applause! Not enough people appreciate sex tourists."

"If accounts on every social media site have taught me anything it's that I'm so glad my family doesn't know my username."

"Sir it would appear that you have sugar poisoning ""You mean Diabetes?"" Ooh look at me, I'm a patient that knows all the diseases ooh"

"If I use the bathroom at someone's house and they are out of hand soap, no more high-fives for that person."

"Whats blue and pretty on top, and brown and kind of a bummer in the bottom? The Mediterranean Sea."