100391

Joke of the Day

"So I shot my first turkey for thanksgiving today... It scared the hell out of the people in the frozen foods section though."

"Tip: if you don't want comedians weighing in on politics.... ...don't elect a joke. (Credit to Bo Burnham)"

"Management tip - only hire bald guys. They don't have anything going on besides work."

"what do you call a male suppository? A manpon"

"A blonde walks into a doctor's office and says, Doc, I'm horribly sick! The doctor looks at her and asks, flu? No, I drove here."

"What do you call a movie producer that gives you more detail than you really wanted? TMI Burton."

"My Wife always asks why I make science jokes. Y*_o_* ?"

"What's a nerdy way of saying a bad word? A canine with two X chromosomes."

"but what does Jesus do when he wants to swim"

"What do you call the delivery boy at an Indian restaurant? Curry-er."