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Joke of the Day

"You're so unfamiliar with the gym... You call it James"

"Why was the accountant constipated? He couldn't budget."

"What's Mary short for? She's got no legs."

"I found the quickest way for a woman to make you a millionaire. See, first you need to be a billionaire..."

"I like my coffee like I like my women. Irish!"

"Why you never mess with imported ants? Because they are **important**."

"The human soul weighs 1.2lbs. I know because I've weighed myself before and after I walk into my job"

"So my uncle is starting a summer camp... It's for kids about to be molested."

"Adele was outside my window this morning. She said hello from the outside."

"With the right person, there is no such thing as inappropriate behavior."